Feel like I’m behind a one-way mirror
Wanting you to see me
You are not aware of my era
So I yell and pound the glass
Feel like hollerin’
Too much built up inside of me
So I spit
Free ain’t easy
Enslaved to the time
Slowly moving me rapidly tormenting
My hometown hood been torn down before me
Now standing on bones of lost souls
Casino dreams and rich man schemes
Looks like soup in a bowl
I don’t know what it use to be
My eyes really don’t see
Hearts in my head
Pounding thoughts instead
Piss stains in the bed
From early years
Nightmares
Old now still here
What!
Should I be ashamed of the truth?
Head of household taxed
Who tacked on this roof?
Section 8’s not a part of a book
But it is, bittersweet
Kisses - no candy to eat
To hate comes easy
Love- no two in the home
Many children though
Bills screamin’ pay me now
Never quit she bows
On knees
To manager demands
Hired for a second part-time
Blowing head in the park to please
Caught by eyes of a youth on bike passin’ by
Pictured as a tool
Fighting against bent rules
That let you get your way
By way of loss esteem
Killin’ time with smokes
Weekend tilt high with Bose
Corned flaked toes
A smile or two in between woes
Hear screams under pillows at night
Dreams that bite
What the…What now!
Awoke to sirens and confused lights
People in underwear drapes
Half asleep/half awake
In the mist of screams from a child
Cops subdue anyone who runs their mouth
Who done gave up their city rights?
Slum- you betta run
Feel like hollerin’
Don’t know what this is
Man walks by looking gooder than a woman
For a sec’
Is this world f-ed up with specks?
‘Cause it’s hot up in here
Brainwaves swell
Anger boiled
But ice never melts
Stories to tell
By windows with ears
But no one’s listenin’
Only head nods to fodder
Lost and misguided fathers
Snow ain’t pretty when it glistens city stains
Pipe dreams-graffiti
On old buildings
1960 stains on ceilings
2003’s here quick but simmering like slavery yesterday
Nothing’s changed but me
Too many in my face
Ask what-do what- what the…
I need a break
My memories swimming up stream
All in me- fish like memories
Skimming dreams off cake like treats
What’s left is me, you
Stretched rubber-busted beats
Abortions happen daily mentally
HUD one two three my crib’s the streets
Furnace don’t give in
Cold up in here
No one’s full of fear
Standing
Elevated by stairs
Footsteps in the mind
Someone’s coming in here
Drips, heart skips
Reality bent
Who wants some of this?
Paranoid but no android
These thoughts
From incinerators flow
Truths and dares
Human flares
The don’t know stare
Welcome to the classroom
How hard is it to care
Old man passes by my car at a light
Stops to stare at me
Froze/paused the Green
First things first
Unchosen-Rose in stems off the streets
Can you hear me?
Picked up like an old Hi-Fi needle spinnin’
Dust accumulatin’
Still kickin’ sound
But for a moment turned it down
What’s yo prob! Betta get to steppin old man
But then I thought maybe he had a moment
Something I reminded him of deep down memory lane
A scratched record in his mind
Maybe I was someone from his past
Maybe he picked up on some energy
I don’t know
Don’t mistake me for a foe!
Switched him to 78 as I jetted on my way
Final credit hour’s the longest on the clock
Finally got life’s degree
Over here (Germany) they call niggas Gypsies
Ghettos don't seem that hard
Cut pockets picked by organized packs
Minds still heavy with rocks
This is where I stop to toss my cap into the air
“Holla”
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