If you only knew that the void you left was never filled
That the pain and sadness is masked by my superwoman shield
The feelings of inadequacy as you left your child behind
The scars and childhood images of me fatherless plague my mind

If you only knew the innocence and security you stole from me
The day you molested my body and spirit ensuring I would no longer be free
The hurt, anger, bitterness and darkness I constantly feel
The emotional suffering I often attempt to disguise and conceal

If you only knew the damage and blemishes from not having you around
The sporadic self-esteem issues due to lack of a mother weighing me down 
The grief, rejection and unhappiness that sometimes surrounds my heart
The overwhelming need to begin again and undo the sorrow created from the start

If you only knew the day and night dreams to be a part of the in crowd
The longing to be accepted flaws and all with sunshine dispelling the cloud
The depression, somberness and misery that consumes my soul
The inevitable demise from my life story being one day told

If you only knew my need to be respected, cherished and loved
The anguish from my love to you returning void and snubbed
The torment, heartbreak and heaviness that hides inside my core
The regrets from being just another female notch, trick, bet or score

If you only knew my intentions to be a friend, provider and lover to you
The hunger to be adored, reverenced and valued with passion that's true
The pleasure, satisfaction, delight and joy I seek to experience and reciprocate
The attempts to be the man of your dreams, fairytales and the one who stimulates

The fears, dreams, wishes, mistakes and desires are all the same
The tongue, emotions, feelings, lust, love and mind are sometimes hard to tame
The happy, sad, good, bad, win, lose, ups, downs, peace and strife for me and you
The trials, tribulations, challenges, triumphs are universal in this life...If you only knew