So alone I stand figuring out that this is how its gonna be
The notion of ever fitting now gone 
replaced with a reluctant acceptance
Instead of succumbing to the pit 
I place myself on the sphere floating above everything else 
unable to bring myself to be part of a definition that cannot define.
My blatant chaos is no match for your disguised disorder
Your fear of me leaves you calling me names you made up 
for the sake of your sanity.

I stand alone occupying minimum space so as not to step into yours
The rooms we once shared now a haven for memories long erased
Stories now misplaced among fables left for prying ears
So as not to mistaken my love for worship 
I lay dormant gestures I once wrote to you in love letters
Although no regret accompanies me home
I wonder if my giving altered any part of your ego?

Alone in this mind of mine I search for a peace I no longer recognize
accepting that nothing fits that was given for me to wear
I see now that alone I stand giving only to give
expecting nothing more or less than what is received
The secrets I keep mime actions long ago played
My only priority now is keeping my sanity safe
Encompassing my heart in my soul 
with the defense mechanism I put in place for emergencies

This isn’t the first time and it wont be the last