The Queen of Walgreens

by Henry Hardee

Walgreens is my mother's favorite store. It's the one she shops at on her way to work or home from work to pick-up a few things that we need. It might be just a tube of tooth paste because she knows the one sitting on the shelf over the sink in the bathroom only has a few squeezes left in it. They carry her favorite brand of soap, deodorant and the extra-strong pain reliever that she takes because we are always giving her a headace. She goes there because she says it helps her to save money and that's a big thing because I have two sisters and a brother.

She goes there so much that people think she works there. She even has to laugh at herself when we call her "The Queen of Walgreens". We know that if it is not in the "Walgreen's Sale Paper" we are not going to get it. I have seen her tear that paper apart looking for what is 39 cents, 99 cents, or 89 cents. I have seen it so many times that I know that clothes are the only things that I am going to get from another store.

It seems like everything in our house came from there. We sit in those yellow, lime, aqua and dark blue "Elite Quad Bright Chairs" that people sit on in the park when they go to concerts. We eat off the "Color Collection" line of tableware that she got for the "Everyday Low Price" of 33% off. We don't know what it is to use anything but plastic bowls, plates and cups with pink, lime, clear and white thin stripes on them.

Our house smells like "Walgreen Solid Air Freshener" one week because she saw it in their sale paper 3 for $1.00. After that ran out it smelled like "Renuzit" because it was on sale for the "Great Price" of 79 cents "each. After she saw a roach crawling around the " L'Oreal Lip Colour" sitting on her dresser our house smelled like "Raid" roach spray that happened to be on sale 2 cans for $3.99.

I know what I'm going to eat for the next two weeks just by looking at the canned food that is being advertised, "Spam or Ham-Sale! $1.99" , " Bush's Best Baked Beans--Super Value three for two dollars", " Breakfast Cereal--Buy one at $4.29 cents and GET 1 Gallon of milk for $1.99 cents."

When my sisters , brother and me clean up the house she uses "7 Day Coupon" to buy us "Pringles" for 99 cents and "Hershey Candy Bars"- 4 for a dollar to show her appreciation

When she sees "Buy One Get One Free", "7 Day Coupon", "Two for five dollars", "Three for one dollar"," Two for three dollars" and "Two for four dollars" on something it seems like she tries to break her neck to go and to buy it . Ahhhhhhhh- I don't ever want to see another "Souper 6-Pack of Ramen Noodles" or eat corn beef, roast beef and chicken breast out of a can again!

When I get eighteen and get out of this house I ain't never gonna step foot in a Walgreens- NO- not over my dead body.

The Queen of Walgreens by Henry Hardee

© Copyright 2006. All rights reserved. No portion of this work may be duplicated or copied without the expressed written consent of the author.

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