a kidney stone dislodged
                hurling forward inch by slow inch
                         closer, closer
 freedom in a quarter-inch groove of blood and pus along the way
                       nothing left to void
                and yet one more makes its way out

                          just like that

              passing each day, I scour the streets
down dark halls to my new corner office, its bright leather chair
              a skyline view, the whole of the city
                        drawn into my bed,
          inching my way between silk brocades, damasks
              I wedge myself snugly in the recesses
                    your long-legged caresses.

                  But tonight finds me possessed
                        looking elsewhere,
                            fidgeting
               fear that your inquisitions somehow
           shine a bright beacon into my hidden caches
                    the multicolored gemstones
                       that make up my soul
                      that leave me agitated
     my whole body contorts, folded double against the skyline
                     vibrating uncontrollable
                     tears overwhelm my eyes
                   and I see for the first time
                       that you find in me
                              not me
         but absolutely everything you'd wanted all along

    covered head to toe with the stains I mistook for freedom
                    I throw my shoulders back
             stretching tip-toed a few inches taller
                 precariously trying to maintain
                      balance and propriety
                     making obscene gestures
                     meant only for me to see

            waiting for the next stone to pass my way
                     witnessing all the while
                   where this blood comes from
                         where it will go