The Wooing of Marrianne Pureheart

by Vince Rogers

In any triangle of love there comes a time when one must choose. Love as you know was made for two. This was Marrianne Pureheart’s time to choose.

Marrianne had two suitors, Ian Sencere and Truth Lovejoy. They were both fine young men of breeding and style. Dashing was young Ian, bling, bling and all. Truth was a gentleman in every sense of the word. Marriane herself was a very beautiful young girl and a stern judge of character - you could say she was all that.

One day when her two beaus arrived at the same time, Marrianne took this opportunity to announce to her two boos that she was going to make a choice. “I love you both,” she said “but I must make a choice.” She continued to speak as she fluttered about the crib, "...therefore I have decided that the one who gives me the best gift will win my heart.” They both accepted the challenge and signified their exuberance by a resounding shout of “Word!!!!”

They both set out to find just the right gift to prove their love. After several days they were called upon to appear before Marriane. She could not wait to find out what manner of bling and things the gentleman had purchased with their hard earned cheddar. Ian was well prepared, his gift all ready to give - after all he did have loochie. Truth however had failed to think of a suitable gift as his pockets were not quite as fat. On the way to her house he passed a florist. He went in and brought a simple dozen of roses.

They both arrived to present their gifts, It appeared that Ian was empty handed, but he informed them his gift was outside. They all proceeded alfresco where wrapped in a red ribbon was a shiny black Bentley Continental GT - a fat whip indeed. Marriane was thrilled and almost overcome with joy. Then came Truth’s turn. From behind his back he brought forth a white box bound by a much smaller red ribbon and of curious size compared to Ian‘s big package. She opened the box, gazed upon the roses and was genuinely moved. She chose Truth.

Ian was outraged. “I am reproached fair lady and I demand satisfaction” Ian exclaimed. “I spent a lot of time and hard earned scrilla trying to woo you - what the bidness baby???” To this she replied, “My reason is simple enough. In games of love ’tis easy to get got, when all you invest is money and spend a lot. In affairs of the heart ’tis easy to see - Truth always prevails over Insincerity.”

The Wooing of Marrianne Pureheart by Vince Rogers

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