I want to
But, I won't
These are some of the emotional phrases I've spoken verbally
and mentally that pertains to our schizophrenic relationship.
I'm beyond confused and overwhelmed to act upon a concise thought.
I want to run. I want to listen to the loud voices yelling at me to run.
Yet, I stand still instead.
Steadfast, unmovable, bracing winter without protection from her cold embrace.
I succumb to our environment with hypothermia slowing my heart rate.
Blame overwhelmingly takes over us.
I try to calm the inferno of flames,
but my tears are not enough to drown a burning desire so ashes remain
Our precious memories of hurts and losses weren't consumed.
However, the embers of our delight just float in the wind for everyone's viewing.
The devastation of a burnt down residence saddens all onlookers.
In spite of it all, there's not a pinch of sympathy from me or you.
We won't or don't
We want to or will
Seem to love the other
Make new memories to replace the old
Stop the sparks of our tongues that ignites
Guard each others hearts for a love soo strong
Embrace all the pains and admit ones wrongs
Heal to trust one another to completely move on
See a future that we once wanted soo deeply
To see God's purpose for you and me
I choose to
Even if you don't love me
Know that you're just as broken as me
See the mistakes, faults, and liability that I own.
Recognize your selfish finger pointing is not working.
Understand that I can't repair us alone.
Feel the bystanders diss ease, disappointment,
and disgust as we participate in our soap opera diaspora
Get that how we treat each other is how we treat our on selves.
Enough, enough, enough!
Or have to
Blame you anymore!
I love the both of us.
So much so, that I'll let go.
Freedom for you
Freedom for me
Is enough is...