Am I Not Nothing?

by Soyini Denise Liburd

Who Am I?
Tell me -
How do you define me?
Am I pretty?
Do you want me?

If yes, I can walk with a smile right?
Shake everything and hold my face to the sky right?
Blind myself to all the unfortunate sisters beneath me
- who can’t be me 
Is that how it goes…?

And what if you laugh inside?
Or even forget to notice 
That I might be a woman too
Then no amount of sweet personality can win you
Cause I am shit right?
So you tell me with the scorn in your eyes
So say your blessed sisters when they pass me by
Not worth anything 
Is that how you flow?

And what if I could be both
Could have seen both sides…
Should this add to my confusion?
Or to my certainty
That I am nothing.

I haven’t changed
Same amount of sweet personality
Still the same me
That you loved … and didn’t
And loved … and didn’t
… and … didn’t 

So am I nothing?
Because I couldn’t hold my appeal - or your love?
Or could my worth possibly be
more than what you tell me you see?

I am confused
And all my life I have turned to you - so tell me
How do you define me today?
What’s in store for me tomorrow?
Do I smile? Do I cry?
Or do I sit in the shadows
while you and your fly world pass me by?

Tell me
Do I hide? Do I die?
Or is Today
The Day
I Rise?

Am I Not Nothing? by Soyini Denise Liburd

© Copyright 2000. All rights reserved. No portion of this work may be duplicated or copied without the expressed written consent of the author.

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