My Story

by Sinsaysion

When you look at me you probably see a woman of the norm
One who has all the joys of life and has never seen harm
You probably see a role model from the way she holds her head
Maybe you see substance, from the strength in her stance
She fashionable, always rocking the latest phat farm and rocawear
Super fly and never crys from the commentments of women nor men
She's unique and extra sweet from the hair on her head down to her feet
And that sweet smiles just adds to the thunder in her voice when she speaks
But see your eyes are only meant to see what's on the outside of me
But the inner pain and the turmoil in my heart is what you aren't able to see
Yet you judge me like you know me....or the things I've been through
When in actuality you couldn't bare half my pains and i know that it's true
So sit back and relax I'm gonna unveil a mystery
Better yet take a walk in my shoes, let's go back in history
I want you to go back and be
The little girl in hair ties
Rocking the cutest little flip-flops
With her heart full of pain and lies
See that father she loved so
Didn't return what she felt
Instead he lied to cover up
All of the drugs that he dealt
Go back and know how it feels
To be second to one who made you
Not second to the love of living
But to the love of dominoes and pimp juice
To the love that has left him there
Standing with an half filled cup
But he never let go of his crack love
Instead he gave his love for me up
Then go back and be that young girl
Who really needed her mother
But her mother worked three jobs
To take care of her sisters and brothers
And then her cousins came in
Taking more of mom's time
So she never had anyone
To unravel her mind
Then go back a couple of years after
She was betrayed by her father
And be the little girl who wore a smile
Though in her heart there were bothers
She was introduced to a thing
That only lovers should know
And taken from an innocent childhood
To become a grown mans hoe
Imagine him licking her clit
And having her sucking him off
Then tell me I haven't had pain
And tell me that nothing was lost
Then go back and be that teenager
Who tried to live life correct
But all her attempts of having friends
Ended with sadness and regret
See she kissed ass everyday
So that people would love her
She tried to do what they wanted
So that they'd treat her like others
And when they fucked with her daily
She obey her mom's and walked away
But in her heart she always wanted
To put those hoes in their graves
Then go be that teenager 
Who has learned again to love
Be with a man for 2 years 
And then let that man fuck up
Because she wouldn't get on her knees
And do the things that he pleased
So he looked elsewhere for pleasure
And left her there with his ring
Then be that girl who found true love
But didn't know how to react
Because never in her life
Had she had someone have her back
Be the girl who told lies
Because that's all that she knew
Then try to make that love work
And have it blow up on you
See you're so quick to judge
And that's only half of what I know
I know how it feels to be treated like a low down dog and a hoe
And I know just how it feels to be betrayed by your father
And how to lose my faith in christ because life's fucked up, so why bother
I know how it feels to be looked at for something that I'm not
And I know how to stop the bad habits of lying cause that's not what i was taught
I know how to take all the pain....and push it back in my mind
But I haven't quite figured out
Just how to leave that shyt behind
Before you start judging me
Just take a walk in my shoes
Don't judge a book by it's cover
Because only the inside tells the truth

My Story by Sinsaysion

© Copyright 2005. All rights reserved. No portion of this work may be duplicated or copied without the expressed written consent of the author.

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