Birth of a Father

by Derrick McFadden a.k.a. DMecca7

On August 23rd 2003 I received a gift that gave my life a brand-new meaning. That was the day that my wife gave birth to our firstborn, a healthy baby boy, in which we named Damien Leroy. For all the men out there if you haven’t experienced the birth of your child, you have truly missed a phenomenal event. For those that are expecting a little one into this world, you should make it a top priority to be right there with your mate when the time comes. It will change your life forever and create a stronger bond with your mate and child at least it did for me. The whole process was so amazing. I mean I find it hard to come up with a description that will serve this experience justice. The entire pregnancy was a learning experience for me. I read books I scanned web sites read articles just so I could be prepared for whatever may come. I did my part with pride and enthusiasm. I gave emotional support to my wife whenever it was needed. I tried my best to keep her stress level down and that she was comfortable. I made sure my wife drank plenty of healthy fluids and made sure she didn’t overexert herself. Basically I was 110% involved in the whole birthing process and I’m glad I was. Each step we took was like a brand-new high that never let up. From the day I found out we were expecting, to the day that we heard his first heartbeat, to the day we found out we were having a son. It was amazing each time.

On the day that we were to find out what gender he was I was so anxious and nervous. I remember it like it was yesterday. My wife was on the examination table and I was sitting next to her holding her hand as the nurse did her thing in identifying the sex. Our eyes were glued to the monitor as the nurse took pictures of our little one. First she took pictures of the head from various angles, she then moved onto the feet, and next were the legs and arms, the whole time avoiding the money shot. I was so tense through the whole ordeal; the butterflies in my stomach felt more like hummingbirds. The suspense was killing me. I tried to remain calm by enjoying the surrounding music, that’s when Stevie rang out through the radio and that’s when I knew it was going to be a boy. Sure enough she got the right angle and it revealed that we were expecting a little boy. My wife burst into tears, which were followed by mine. We couldn’t wait to get out of there so we could tell the whole world the news. That truly was a wonderful moment that preceded the birth of little Damien.

Finally the day arrived or should I say night arrived that our son was born. His birth wasn’t the typical situation that you see on TV where the water breaks and there is a big rush to the hospital with chaos in the air. In our case we went past our due date and elected to get induced. I think little man was having too much fun in the confines of my wife’s bulbous like belly and wasn’t planning on coming out anytime soon. My wife on the other hand wasn’t trying to go any longer with this heavy load. The way she saw it was that she did her nine months and that’s all she was doing. She was tired and the heat was really getting the best of her, being that it was summertime and all. We set our appointment to be induced and we informed family and friends on the day and time. Once there we got set up in our delivery room and the doctor briefed us on what to expect. My wife got prepped and the doctor and nurse started the whole induction process. Little did we know that this process would be lengthy and drawn out. In the meantime my wife’s family and friends trickled in and out. It ended up being nine people including myself in the delivery room. We even got a surprise when my wife’s sister showed up from Phoenix. It added that extra specialness to the birth. We were also surprised that the doctor allowed that many people to stay for the birth.

My wife was in a very calm mood as was I, up until the medicine used for induction kicked in. That’s when my wife’s cheery mood turned to some serious, uncomfortable, edgy, irritable, no smiles, evil eyed type of vibe. In which I can understand, so I went into super husband mode. I tried to make her laugh, smile, giggle, whatever, none of it worked. In fact I think it made it worse, so I did the most logical thing; sit down and shut my trap. Finally the time arrived and they had my wife in position to bring our bundle of joy into this world. I was on one side holding my wife’s leg and my mother-in-law was on the other side with my man Stevie Wonder playing in the background. I decided to make a Stevie Wonder cd to help relax the event and it was only right since his music was there when we found out it was a boy. Besides I’m a huge fan of Stevie’s work, getting back to back to the moment.

We all worked together as a team in delivering our little gift to the world. It was a wonderful experience being there holding my wife, coaching, counting, and consoling her. The ultimate was when little Damien’s head started to pop out. The whole room lit up with excitement, and my heart started pounding like a jackhammer. Then it happened, it was like me and my wife was the only ones in the room. All my emotions seem to come together as one and this calm came over me. All I remember is the doctor motioning to me to come over so I could catch our son as he came out. That was the best feeling ever, holding a new life that I helped create. Something my wife and I prayed for and almost gave up on.

The moment was priceless. It was so unreal as I passed him to my wife. She was full of tears as he let out this thunderous cry which was music to my ears. So strong and loud, it made my chest swell like I was being pumped with air. I could hear my wife’s friends and family letting out sounds of joy as my wife wrapped her arms around him. It was truly a magnificent sight seeing my wife and our newborn son. I was so caught up in the moment that my tears didn’t come, but inside I was beaming like a lighthouse on the coast of North Carolina. I felt like the luckiest man in the world, and I still do.

Since the birth of our son my life has taken on a new meaning. I find myself trying to take better care of myself. I started taking classes and I’m watching my income more closely now. I look at my wife in a totally different light. She is so beautiful to me and I love watching her turn into a mother. She just shines with love whenever she handles our son. I thank God for her and my son and the chance to experience it all. They keep my heart filled with love. They make life taste so much sweeter. Looking back on that 23rd day of August 2003 I realized that not only was it the day my son was born it was also my birth as a father. So to all the guys out there that got one on the way, all I can say is, get involved do your part and be there for your mate. Make sure you are in that delivery room to see the birth of your child and maybe just maybe your birth as a father will come forth as well.


Birth of a Father by Derrick McFadden a.k.a. DMecca7

© Copyright 2004. All rights reserved. No portion of this work may be duplicated or copied without the expressed written consent of the author.



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