What am I trying to say to you now?
Now that it's gone so far
And I don't even remember how
I mean where and why and who we
Are
Separately
I mean because we're always together
Even if not physically
I don't know
Exactly
How to put this
Extravagantly
But I don't know if I can ever
Be with you
Technically
Because that would mean
That you would
Have me
Then would you think of me
Differently?
I don't know why my mind does this
Crazy thing
But every time I get that feeling of
Being
Or whenever I get closer to
Seeing
Seeing what?
I don't know
That's what I'm saying
Because whenever I go
To this point my feelings are displaying
A tune different to what my mind
Is relaying
To me
Which would be
Well R. Kelly says
"My mind is telling me no
But my body's telling me yes"
But with me it's not physical
It's like a mental
War
And I don't know if
I want to explore
I mean it's easier to live
Behind a closed door
And at times I want to
Break out
But do I really know
What the world is about?
Or what I would find?
Maybe a liar, one trying to blind
Or perhaps one with intentions kind
Either way there's something wrong with
My mind
It feels like there's a battlefield in it
And it's at war with my heart and my spirit
So sometimes when you're talking
It's hard for me to hear it
And sometimes when we're walking
The gun smoke can make it
Difficult to see
If you're walking with me
Or taking the lead
And that just
Feeds
This war I'm declaring
And I know I can be daring
And brave enough to walk away
But do I have the courage to stay?