by Blackpearl

Why do I continue to fall for those
That have less of a heart than me?
Those who aren't free to give who they are
Users, abusers and manipulators
Are all I seem to meet
Losers with lower self-esteem than myself
And they say I am the one who has issues
Do I have issues because I am desperately seeking companionship?
Because I get attached so quickly
and have expectations because I slept with you
For the first time in my life,
I am really beginning to examine the patterns
I have set for myself
I can't blame anyone else
It was me that didn't know the consequences of my actions
How little I am regarded in this world
The prize is between my thighs
Because they fail to value my heart, mind, and soul
Fail to see who I am
And what I am capable of, both the good and the bad
So they prefer to treat me as if I am nothing
And easily discard me, like a piece of clothing
That has lost its newness
For awhile now I have been tired of this
But I always moved on to the next
Now my life is a wreck because I have no love
The love I receive from my kids is different
And it does nothing for those lonely nights
When I would rather lay my head on the chest of a man
That understands my needs, and the reasons I have for being me
A man to kiss the tears away from my eyes
To touch my very soul with his compassion and insight
What do you do when you have no one to hold you tight
When what you really need is  a hug and someone to say
"everything's going to be alright"
where do you get the strength that we all need each day
when your supply is running low and the demand is high?
That extra push or nudge that we all need to keep going.
How do I enter a relationship without my feelings showing?
What men want is a challenge, they like to overcome
Like my heart is a playing field.
No thank you sir, I have had enough of games, lies, and heart break
I have to realize that there is a lot at stake
When you deal with these men in boys clothing
They aren't ready to give their hearts a safe haven
It takes them a lifetime to surrender to love
They spend so many years fighting
Against what is natural and right
It's not manly or macho to be without love
It's in direct opposition to God's will
How many women out there ask, "who will love me"
and how many have given up hope to the point
where they don't even ask the question no more?
I want to stop asking, but the question slips out
in my dreams, actions, and thoughts
 My soul is dying but who cares?
Certainly not those that are the cause of the failure in the beginning

What do you do when you are not what's on the menu?
When there's more of you to go around
but no one is around to even sample the goods.
"Can't give it away" is what I hear my sisters say
Most people think they mean they can't find anyone to give their bodies to
Well let me tell you a woman can dick when she can't get anything to eat
But what we mean when we say "can't give it away"
We speak of love and love only
We don't want to give our bodies but ourselves
and be accepted unconditionally

Questions by Blackpearl

© Copyright 2000. All rights reserved. No portion of this work may be duplicated or copied without the expressed written consent of the author.

TimBookTu Logo

Return to the Table of Contents | Return to Main Page